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Writings of Ralpharama


Most of my recent writing is here now: ralpharama.co.uk/o

Article 1995 Hits 2993 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
All about 1995
Article 1996 Hits 3113 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
All about 1996
Article 1999 Hits 2764 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
All about 1999.
Article 2000 Hits 2703 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
All about the year 2000
Article 2002 Hits 4088 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
All about 2002.
Article 2003 Hits 2977 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
All about 2003
Article A farewell to tobacco Hits 3905 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
I have what would be described as a love-hate relationship with tobacco.
Article A Mound of White Bones Hits 2658 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
Over the purple mountains to the east lies a forest where nobody ever goes. Nobody goes to the forest not because of wild creatures or monsters, but simply because no one knows that it is there. Except for an old, eccentric man and his young son, and even he found it by accident.
Article Animals Hits 2312 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
Written in Mexico during insanity-inducing boredom
Article Back Street Bar Hits 5243 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
So I sat, alone, at the end of the bar, staring across the room to where some Canadians were laughing, screaming, and generally flirting with the off-duty strippers.
Article Festival Montreal en Lumiere Hits 4580 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
An old article from some years ago I just found about a (cold) festival in Montreal.
Article Fpa 1 Hits 3357 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
Flight.
Article Fpa 2 Hits 2790 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
Belgian Hitch
Article Fpa 3 Hits 5404 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
Wanderlust Born
Article Fpa 4 Hits 3021 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
Used and refused
Article Fpa 5 Hits 2938 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
Dusseldorf: Arrivals
Article Fpa 6 Hits 3253 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
Mr X
Article Fpa 7 Hits 2766 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
Dusseldorf: Gifts
Article Fpa 8 Hits 3899 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
Dusseldorf: Enchantress
Article Fpa 9 Hits 3318 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
Dusseldorf: Escape
Article Fpa prologue Hits 2744 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
A novel I was writing some years ago. Whilst is is based on some real events, it should be read as fiction...
Article FPA Screenplay Hits 3137 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
A forgotten screenplay for a book that was never finished. it was too complex for a first book, I think.
Article Grubs whores and landmines Hits 6451 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
About an hour inside Cambodia we stopped at a roadside establishment that had been spawned simply to service tourists en route to Siem Reap from the border. The staff inside happily accepted any currency and provided change in tattered Cambodian Reals, which resulted in a lot of confused looking tourists - Reals are worth about 3,900 to the US dollar, so even if people wanted to check their change, they had a hard time because most of them had handed over Thai baht in the first place. After a few weeks in Cambodia, you either become an expert in tri-currency conversion, or lose a lot of cash.
Article Half-man, half-biscuit Hits 9674 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
One of the most popular types of monster throughout history has been the half-man, half-something-else. A good examples of a scary half-men creatures are the werewolf (half-man, half-wolf), minotaur (half-man, half bull) and zombie. Zombie? I hear you cry. Yes - half-man, half-dead. On the whole it seems like taking half of a man away and adding half of something else creates an evil entity, bent on death and destruction. There are notable exceptions though, which I'll talk about in a moment.
News Journals Hits 4603 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
Writing things down in a little book could be a dying art...
Article Little archaeologist story Hits 4197 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
A short story written for a java game I wrote some years ago.
Article Memories between 4 and 6 Hits 2017 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
My very first memory in life is a lie. I'm about 3 years old and we've just arrived at my Grandmother's house, it is sunny and I'm wearing shorts and a striped T-shirt. My Grandmother is waiting on her lawn to meet us with our dog - a large Irish Setter called Finbar. Finbar is excited to see us and runs over to us, almost knocking me over, then licking my face with joy.
Article Risk Hits 5793 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
I'm not terribly scared of electrical storms, I was never traumatised as a child by stories of giants in the clouds being angry, or any other such nonsense. During thunder and lightning I like to go outside, to the top of the nearest hill and watch the show. I don't think being hit is very likely.
Article Shouting Hits 2473 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
A random story I found on my hard drive recently, it was prefixed with: "I lived in Montreal for a couple of years a while ago. Nice place, distinct lack of crime and any rough edges"
Article Sleep Hits 3127 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
An article about sleep that I wrote, re-found recently on my hard-drive.
Article Suzy's Bar, Takasaki Hits 23957 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
Ah, the memories. This was a bar in Takasaki, where I used to drink in 1996/1997.
Article The Bus Game Hits 4959 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
Unsure when, or why, this was written
Article The Crooked Penny Inn Hits 3182 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
The candles burned low in the Crooked Penny Inn. The four figures huddled around a beer stained table concentrated upon the tiles in front of them. The game was known as Lucky Mary in these parts and many a man had lost a fortune on the turn of a not so lucky tile. Halgar Blacktooth frowned deeply as he looked again at the images of the four winds from the east in his hand, this was a good hand, but his final tile, the six of goblins which he had just picked up, didn't help at all.
Blog The George Hits 2634 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
So we're walking through the streets in the rain. I'm upset already as we spent a valuable 30 minutes of drinking time watching some god-awful move-to-spain-and-fix-up-an-old-house programme. The rain really doesn't improve our moods as we splash through puddles and scowl into the wind.
Article The Hilton Hotel, In East Croydon, England Hits 4663 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
My idea was to return to the hotel and sip a Martini and smoke a cigarette before retiring. I was dismayed to find that there was a large Xmas party occurring, and so the bar was rather busy, the staff looked harassed.
Article The Quest for Hashish Hits 6003 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
I met a strange man a few nights ago in a downtown bar - strange mainly because he seemed to be wearing home-made clothes and make-up. During the course of our chit-chat conversation I happened to ask him what he did for a living. 'I grow grass.' He said.
Article Thirty-One Hits 2822 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
Written on my 31st birthday, I just found this article and thought I'd publish it again. It charts my life, year by year...
Article Unfinished screenplay Hits 2955 | Last Modified 2007-05-31
Untitled, Unfinished screenplay written about a year ago.


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